Sick chicken in the house, terrible twos, a baby that has an aversion to sleep and a mother on the edge of insanity...

I usually try my best to write positive thoughts and even some helpful posts, but sometimes you just have to rant. These past few weeks have been quite taxing on, both, myself and Adrian, mostly because we are sleep deprived! Our baby girl Mia has taken it upon herself to slowly but surely drive us insane and she's succeeding. How long can a human being go on without sleep I wonder? More often than not I find myself sitting on the couch, desperately trying to keep my eyes open, which probably makes me look like an owl on a bad caffeine trip. I'm daydreaming a lot and simply can't focus on anything for very long. I'm a lot less patient than I used to be and have a harder time dealing with Noah, who has picked this difficult time in our lives to hit us with the full brunt of the terrible twos. To torture us even more, I'm sure. They're tag-teaming us, and man they do NOT know the word mercy. He doesn't listen; his answer to everything is NO! and he's spending a big part of the day on the time-out chair. That doesn't keep him from getting off and going right back to doing what earned him the time-out in the first place though.

I can honestly say that I haven't been this exhausted and frustrated like... EVER! On bad nights, Mia wakes up every hour and won't stop screaming until I take her out of her crib. Last week, Noah - who usually sleeps through the night - had a cold and a stuffy nose that kept waking him up as well. One night I had to get out of bed a grand total of 11 times, and just to add the cherry on top, Mia is also an early riser and is up at 5 am sharp every morning. All the waking and crying at night must tire them out though, because they do pass out in the most random places in the middle of playing or eating, which is quite comical, but also makes me resent them for being able to just collapse wherever they are.

Oh, to be a child again. I was doing the dishes the other day and kept thinking to myself, What if I just put my head down right here on the counter and get a little shut eye? It certainly works for the kids. Back when I only had one child it wasn't that hard to deal with sleepless nights, even though I thought it couldn't get any worse at the time. I had no idea what was coming for me. When your baby went down for a nap you simply took one too. Now that I've got two, there's no way I'm getting a nap in because they do not nap at the same time. Needless to say, I'm looking like a freaking zombie most of the time. Sometimes I don't even remember getting up to feed the baby until I find myself crawling back into my own bed thinking, Where am I coming from and what have I done? Every evening I put them to bed hoping that this will be the night that she finally sleeps longer than a couple of hours on end. It was nice when she only woke up twice one night, I actually woke the next morning feeling refreshed.

In Mia's defense, she is teething and two of her bottom teeth came in last week, which is probably giving her some discomfort. I keep hoping that once those teeth have fully pushed through, she will sleep longer. What can I say? Being a parent is tough as nails and it doesn't seem to get any easier. I look at them a lot thinking, I love you like crazy but, God, how nice would a week off be? But there is no such thing so you just keep going and going and going, driven only by the primal urge to survive another day. You don't shower as often as you used to - bath-time is out of the question- and you don't have to worry about wearing tights under your jeans in the winter because the fur on your legs keeps you warm enough. Plucking your eyebrows? Nah, I'm thinking of giving the unibrow a go. Might set a new trend and I'm pretty sure you'd all thank me for it. Washing your hair every day? Meh, what are ponytails for? If you've managed to get through the day without strangling your children, kept the house somewhat clean and managed to put a meal on the table, your right up there with Wonder Woman and you should be darn proud of yourself. Here's a picture of myself that I took at about 10am this morning. I call it the exhaustion-selfie! Pitiful sight, isn't it?

To make matters worse, my van has let me down and is in dire need of repair, which will cost us over a $1,000 CAD. I hate it when things like that happen just when you were hoping to pay off your credit card. How in the world are you supposed to get out of the hole, when it feels like someone is standing over you relentlessly throwing dirt on your head? Anyways...

...One of our chickens has taken ill and is currently residing in the house in Rocky's old dog crate. We managed to take it to the vets, where it was given a shot free of charge. I would love to save it and if separating it from the others (who have turned quite mean and have started pecking at her the second she showed weakness) and keeping it in the warm house is the only way, then that's what we'll do. But it's still a pain, because we simply don't have space in the house as it is, and she does smell a lot. She has diarrhea and doesn't eat or drink by herself, and it's just one more chore to add to the list of things I don't want to be dealing with. I do hope the little sista is going to recover - stronger than ever - and will go back into the coop ready to give those mean chicks a piece of her mind. Girls can be so cruel!

So that's what's happening on the homestead right now. Mayhem and chaos and no end in sight. But that's life I suppose and no matter how bad it gets, you've got to pick yourself up, take each day as it comes and do your best. There's always the possibility you'll win the lottery some day or that your children will suddenly decide they have tortured you long enough and will turn into perfect little angels from one day to the next.

On a happier note! My Kickstarter campaign is past the halfway point and my project is currently 55% funded. I have high hopes that this dream will soon become a reality and even if it doesn't work out, I know I have done everything I can. At least I tried, right? That's all one can do nowadays. My brother-in-law has made this cute little poster for me, that is now plastered on every bulletin board in the area.

I have advertised on every social media platform I'm involved in, not to mention the hundreds of private messages and emails I have written to pretty much everyone I know. But once again, I'm asking for your help and support. If you didn't know about my dream of self-publishing a children's book and have just now heard about it, or you were thinking about making a donation but haven't gotten around to it yet; Please, NOW is the time! Every dollar counts! With 14 days still remaining there is still a big chance that I will reach my goal, and you could be part of helping me make this long term dream of mine come true. Check out my project, share my link like there's no tomorrow and please make a donation if you can. 

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/539964571/a-lovingly-created-childrens-book-for-my-kids-and?ref=discovery

It would mean so much to me and our little family. We're on the homestretch, guys! Let's keep at it and make this amazing project happen. Thank you so much!!!

Co-Sleeping: Yay or nay?

I posted a very interesting article on my Homesteading Gypsies Facebook page on Co-sleeping with your newborn a while back that seemed to get a lot of interest, judging by how many times the post has been viewed. So I thought I would go into the topic a little more and share my own experiences, for those of you who are struggling with the decision of whether or not it's a good idea to invite your little bundle into the family bed.
 

Personally, I don't have a problem admitting that both of my children shared the family bed for the first 8-10 months of their little lives and I don't regret it. Even though I am currently trying to get Mia to sleep in her own room, in her own crib, and it's not working out so well. More about that later. There are always those who will shake their head at you, look at you with disappointment and disbelief and consider that you are being irresponsible and that your sleeping arrangements are dangerous. They will make you feel like you're the worst mother in the world. Don't let it faze you and don't change your mind about having your baby co-sleep with you, simply because somebody else is telling you that it's not right and is endangering your child. If it feels right to you, you should stick with it and that statement is pretty much true for anything in life.

My own mother, whom I loved dearly and whose input I always valued and respected, told me numerous times not to have my children sleep in the same bed with us. Not because she thought I was endangering my child, but because she believed I was going to have a heck of a time trying to get them out of the family bed and into their own and she was right. BUT!!! Even though I'm currently going through this with my daughter and haven't gotten much sleep lately due to her constant waking and screaming, you simply cannot avoid this terribly exhausting time altogether. They are going to keep you up for weeks on end whether they do it right after they were born or at a later time. Personally, I'd much rather go through this now that my son is sleeping through the night, and I have gotten used to juggling and taking care of two tiny human beings. 

Back when Mia was born, I tried putting her in her own crib for the first couple of nights and she was not a happy camper. Noah hadn't been sleeping through the night yet and was up at least once himself. I was stressed out, physically still hurting from the delivery and exhausted just thinking about having to take care of two young children. It was a way more stressful time for me than it is now, not to mention that I got to enjoy having my baby girl close and I got to enjoy her cuddles for the first 10 months of her life. It simply felt right to me. Everyone got a deeper sleep and I was able to function a lot better the next day, which was a win-win for everybody involved. It is a lot easier to feed your child without having to get out of bed every couple of hours for those midnight feedings, especially if you're nursing. I truly believe that a baby needs to be close to his or her mother as much as possible during those first few months.

Of course you have to use your common sense and make sure your baby is safe at all times. I removed all the pillows from our bed to make absolutely certain there was nothing around that I could accidentally smother them with. I also have my bed pushed right up against the bedroom wall (and no there is not an inch of space between the bed and the wall that the baby could get stuck in) and had my children sleeping on the wall side of the bed to ensure they wouldn't fall out in the middle of the night. I have had a baby in the family bed for a total of 18 months, and never once have I woken up lying on my child or in any other kind of dangerous situation. I am a very light sleeper and wake up the second there's something out of the ordinary. Of course, I have been puked on more than once, slapped, scratched and kicked and was rudely awakened by one of my children screaming bloody murder only inches away from my ear. But I could also listen to my baby's heartbeat and breathing, make sure they're OK, nursed them without having my precious beauty sleep interrupted and woke up more rested and a lot happier each morning.

 

Just recently, I was doing laundry at the local laundromat, where I overheard a phone conversation between a new Grandmother and Great-Grandmother. Now, I only heard one side of the conversation but I imagine it sounded something like this:

"Yes, the baby is sleeping in the family bed."

"What? Well that simply won't do. Have you told her he needs to sleep in his own crib"

"Yes I have told her but she won't listen to reason. You know how she is. She says every time she puts him down he's crying and won't stop."

"He'll get used to it. Sometimes they just need to cry it out. It's dangerous and irresponsible to have the baby sleep in the same bed with her."

Now, I didn't say anything but I did feel like saying, "Actually no it's not. Get over your outdated parenting guidelines from 1932, read an updated article on the subject and leave your daughter alone for God's sake. It's her baby and her life and she's not purposely endangering the life of her child. She's not a monster!"

Here are some interesting facts: 

• Sleep-sharing, co-sleeping or whatever you might call it is practiced by families all over the world and is a growing trend.

• Co-sleeping can particularly enhance closeness between the father and the child because he simply doesn't have the physical connection that a nursing mother and her baby do.  

• Both, mother and child are more rested and get a better sleep. Who doesn't like the feeling of a warm body next to them when they go to bed? Even I, as an adult, feel a lot safer and more comfortable if I get to cuddle up to my partner at night. So how do you think your baby feels?

• Advocates of attachment-style parenting believe that children who co-sleep grow up more confident and independent because of the early nurturing co-sleeping provides.

• In Japan where co-sleeping and breastfeeding is the cultural norm, rates of the sudden infant death syndrome are the lowest in the world.

• Irrepressible (ancient) neurologically-based infant responses to maternal smells, movements and touch altogether reduce infant crying while positively regulating infant breathing, body temperature, absorption of calories, stress hormone levels, immune status, and oxygenation. In other words co-sleeping makes your baby happy! 

Of course there are pros and cons to everything and like I've said before, you can make co-sleeping safe or unsafe. But you can also make sleeping in their own crib unsafe by adding bumper pads, giving them heavy blankets or having them sleep with a million stuffed animals because you think they need the company. Some babies simply sleep better in their own crib and for some mothers bed-sharing might not work because the wriggling child beside them makes it impossible for them to sleep. Or they are waking up 20 times a night terrified they might have rolled onto the baby and killed it. If that's the case you definitely want to have your child sleep in their own crib because co-sleeping obviously doesn't make sense for you and is not beneficial to anyone. 

My point is, do whatever works for you, don't let anyone tell you what's wrong or right - unless they are professionals and know what they're talking about and let's face it, most people trying to stick their noses into your business are not - and trust yourself and your instincts. Having a baby is great and exciting and looking at their little faces makes you want to burst with happiness. But it is also terrifying, stressful and hard on both body and mind and if co-sleeping works for you, there is no need to make this exhausting time harder than it already is and kick your child out of the family bed just because your hairdresser gave you a disapproving look. 

When it comes to babies, things constantly change. When my son was starting to eat solids, I was told not to give him peanut butter until he was a year old. I'm going to a baby group with my kids and Mia has just started eating solids a few months ago and now they're saying to introduce peanut butter as early as 6 months because they have found that too many children are suffering from peanut allergies and are hoping the early exposure will change that. I could give you a million examples about all the things that have changed since having my son, but I think you're getting the point. You're the mother and you know best what is right for your child. I'm not saying don't listen to anyone. Some guidelines are there for a reason and make sense, and if your health care provider tells you not to do something you should probably listen. All I'm saying is don't let just anyone's opinion matter to you and only listen to those that are qualified to give them. Do what feels right and works best for you and your family, and trust yourself over others, who most likely don't even have children of their own. 

I'm very interested in your opinions and experiences and would love to know how your family sleeps! Don't hesitate to email me or leave me a comment and don't forget to subscribe so you won't miss a post.


P.S.: I'm happy to announce that my children's book that I am looking forward to self-publish by raising funds on a website called Kickstarter.com is currently 21 % funded, thanks to all the generous people who have backed my project thus far. I want to thank everybody for all the kind words, support, encouragement and donations since launching my project. We're on a roll guys. Let's keep going so I get to share this wonderful story with children all around the globe. If you're thinking about helping out you can donate at:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/539964571/a-lovingly-created-childrens-book-for-my-kids-and?ref=nav_search

It would be amazing if you could share this link with the people in your life to help spread the word. Every donation counts towards achieving my goal. Again, thank you so much. I very much appreciate your being a part of making my dream come true!

Reaching for the stars!!!

First of all, I would like to thank all of you for your kind words, encouragement and support since launching my blog. I have taken it to heart and it has motivated me to keep working and make this first year of my 30s the year to make things happen. I have a lot of dreams, but haven't actually taken any action towards turning them into reality in quite some time. Yes, I've had two children within the last three years and it is tiring and utterly exhausting, but that's not an excuse. I could've done a little bit more to work towards my goals, if I'm to be perfectly honest with you. I just got lazy and it has to stop. Turning 30 has given me new perspective and new drive. I feel so much more motivated now and I feel like I need to take advantage of my current state of mind and strike while the iron is hot. So, I've started tackling project 'Self-publishing my first Children's book' and have made some headway. 

I’ve done a ton of research on the topic over the years, as this is something I've wanted to do for a long time now. But, I’ve always abandoned the idea, as we simply didn't have the money to fund this project. Self-publishing does cost a lot and it’s money we simply don't have at this point in our lives. We are a one-income family with two small children, in the process of renovating our small cottage. However, I DO NOT like giving up and have searched the net for ways to make it happen. During my search I stumbled upon a website called Kickstarter.com. For those of you who haven't yet heard of this amazing website, you should check it out because it's simply amazing. I'm not just saying that because it might be the answer to my prayers, but because it's giving people the opportunity to turn their dreams into reality when they don't have the money needed to do so, which is kind of awesome.  

 So many people out there have big dreams, are hungry for change, want to better their lives, or do the things they’re passionate about but it always comes down to money. It's frustrating, depressing and makes you want to scream. Believe me, I know. Finally, there is hope and I really love this concept. Recently, I supported a couple of projects myself and feel really good about it. Wait. Didn't you just say you don't have money, you might ask? Yes, I did say that but here's the thing. You don't have to donate hundreds of dollars to help out. Small amounts help just as much as big donations. Give what you can, even if it's just a couple of bucks, but go to bed that night knowing that you have brought someone closer to fulfilling their dream. It feels nice to help out and hey, what goes around comes around, right? It's all about Karma, people. 

 

So, here is how it works. If you want to bring your creative project to life but don't have the funds to do so, you can simply start a project by telling people your story. You basically sell yourself and what you're trying to do and if somebody loves you or what you're trying to accomplish, they can pledge and help raise funds to make it happen. I think it's an amazing idea because it helps the little people and the dreamers of this world and everybody deserves a chance to succeed, not just the financially blessed. I will check this page on a regular basis from now on and donate some money whenever I can.  

If you want to help a young mother of two self-publish her own children's book, so she can read it to her own children and also share her story with kids all around the world, check out my project at: 

  

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/539964571/a-lovingly-created-childrens-book-for-my-kids-and?ref=nav_search 

Making this happen would also take a big weight off of Adrian's shoulders. Earning some money from home would really mean a lot to me. It sure would be nice to be a stay-at-home mom while still being able to contribute.  

Also, you wouldn't just be supporting one family with your donations, but two, since my amazing and very talented brother-in-law, Mat, is going to be the Illustrator for my book and has already created the beautiful Illustrations you're seeing here and in my Kickstarter video. He is an amazing artist and also an awesome person and both, him as well as his beautiful wife Danielle deserve to be supported.
You can check out his beautiful artwork at:

http://www.matdube.com/

So, who knows? In 3 - 5 months from now, I might just be holding a published copy of a children's book in my hands that has my name on the cover. How awesome would that be? I can hardly wrap my head around the possibility that this may actually happen. And, if it does, I owe it to you people. So, thank you so very much in advance for reading my blog, checking out my project and for helping raise money to fund it. I will be forever grateful to each and every one of you. As usual, I will keep you updated! 

P.S.: In order to make my project a success I really need to spread the word. If you could be so kind and share this link on Facebook or any other social media platform you might be involved in, I would very much appreciate it.

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/539964571/a-lovingly-created-childrens-book-for-my-kids-and?ref=nav_search

Also, if you like my blog then don't forget to subscribe, follow me on Instagram

 http://instagram.com/homesteadinggypsies/

 and like my Homesteading Gypsies Facebook page

www.facebook.com/NinaGypsyMama